My hero of the day is…

my mother in law!

She hemmed these amazing maternity pants for me and they fit perfectly! I got them for a measly $10 at Ross (I told you I hate spending $, right?) They were too long but I knew just the person that could fix it, and she didn’t disappoint. In only a few short days they are like brand new! I don’t sew… I wish I did… scratch that I don’t even have the desire to learn so I’m so thankful for my MIL!

(yes, my dog thinks I’m nuts… hubby says he’s right. First day wearing maternity clothes and I’m more comfortable already! Full panel is were it’s at!)

p.s. this is not a suck up post. My mother in law already loves me, how could she not I’m married to her favorite child  

Thank you Patty from the bottom of my freaking heart, you made my day… now can you make my bra fit?

pregnancy…

I’m sorry my blog has turned into a pregnancy journal, it’s mostly for my own purposes so read if you wish but no one is forcing you… I must start by saying since I got pregnant I swear I come across all the random blog/fb posts about pregnancy and children. It makes me wonder if I didn’t pay that much attention to them before or if there is going to be another baby boom.

I’ve read and heard so many stories about couples trying numerous times and for years with no luck on getting pregnant, it breaks my heart, really it does! David and I were so fortunate to get pregnant right away (although at the time, I didn’t quite feel ready). I don’t know how you could ever be full prepared or in my case “ready” to bring a child into this world all I know is I didn’t feel I was. I clearly remember being married for less than 3 months when David came home from work one day excited because it finally hit him that we could have a baby now, we were married the time was right. We argued over this for many years… literally. I was never that little girl who wanted to be a mom, I was never that little girl who carried around a baby and pretended she was mine. Please don’t get me wrong I always knew I wanted kids but I just didn’t picture myself having a child under the age of 10… silly I know. David on the other hand may have been born to be a father, he is so good with kids he loves every child like crazy and is so good with them. I may or may not be a little jealous…

In May of 2011 after nearly 3 years of David trying to convince me, I had a weak moment (and run out of birth control) it was then I decided to let nature take it’s toll. I didn’t feel “ready” to have a baby but at the same time I didn’t want to want a baby either, if that makes since. I was thinking we’ll see how this goes, in the back of my head remembering my doctor told me it could take up to a year and for some people it happens right away. I decided then and there why I wasn’t comfortable with this baby making idea it’s basically the 1 thing in life I don’t have control of and I’m very good at being in control of things, ha! In June I had a normal cycle, I had been on birth control for years so my cycle was every 4th Friday on the dot and I knew this. In July, I didn’t start on that 4th Friday… weird. My body was off but I assumed it was the years of birth control wearing off and my body starting to figure itself out again. I think I already said this once on here somewhere but David said to me one night when I was a few days late “you’re pregnant” and laughed and said I hoped so because I felt great! I didn’t really think about it much until he mentioned it so the next morning I got up and took a pregnancy test sure enough on July 21st it was confirmed we were going to be parents. David was getting ready for work and I took the test over to him and said “um…” while I stared at him hoping for a reaction, he laughed and thought I was kidding because it was a cheap test that you had to read 3 different lines then follow the pattern to see if it was a yes or no. I cried until I laughed, David was so excited he even did his happy dance, it’s cute ask him to do it for you sometime.

All I started this post for was to say how grateful I am that we were so fortunate not to have the hurt, worry, and play the waiting game to get where we are today. I feel so blessed! I know David deserves it, but I’m still not convinced I do. Besides the obvious growing belly and the strange hormones, sometimes it still doesn’t feel real.

Halloween 2011

Missing these cute girls a little more than usual lately, with the holidays quickly approaching and my hormones raging it breaks my heart to have them all the way across the U.S. I still dislike PA for this very reason! Blasted place anyway. Good vs. Evil this year it’s also very fitting. Ha, I love these chicas and can’t wait for the day they are closer to home!

p.s. I swear they’ve grown a foot since they were home during summer break!

Ahliya stayed the night with us last night, she is such a doll! We painted toes and finger nails. We “shattered” her toe nails and I’m bummed I didn’t get a better picture they were so cute. Her finger nails were the classic orange and black but she insisted on putting pink heart stickers on them too As cute as she is mark my words: my child will NOT act like this at the age of 3 or it will get beat. period. Little stinker tests my patients, big time!

In other news:

-Our Halloween will be spent laying low this year. No parties. No costumes. I did work the day shift so I could hand out treats to all the ghosts and goblins that come a knockin' (that’s always been my favorite part is seeing all the kids dressed up and it looks like we have lots of little ones in the neighborhood, I hope they don’t disappoint) I’m still trying to think of an easy dinner and the pumpkin chocolate chip cookies for dessert are in the oven.

-Today I won 3 more pairs of maternity pants on Ebay, shoot! I told Dave and he was excited for me, he gets tired of my complaining about my clothes being tight or not fitting then I told him to seriously make me quit bidding until I receive all the items I’ve purchased I can’t even remember what I have coming. Pathetic, I know. So just now I tell him I’m going to get on the internet for a bit when he responds, “babe please stay off ebay.” Ha, I almost forgot, he’s good at following orders.

-Upset I just read a blog about a little girl Ruby. I love the name Ruby, and Kate, and Jane… and David won’t even pretend he’ll think about naming our unborn children any of the above.

-I’ve been telling people I secretly hope we’re having a boy, because we have so many nieces but now I think I’ve changed my mind and secretly hoping for a girl also because we have just girls on both sides of the fam. Mostly I just want a healthy baby with 10 fingers and 10 toes! A friend came to see our new house and when David showed him the pink room I heard him say “this will be our baby room and hopefully we’ll have to change the paint color.” I know he would be thrilled with a little girl, but we need to carry on the Spackman name and no pressure but we’re the ones left to make it happen. Only 5 more days and we’ll know what our little one is, the anticipation is still killing me!

Fb…

One of my friends on facebook wrote this as her status today…

“My mama warned me there would be days like this.”

I thought about this statement for a long time, a really long time because you know me and I think and re-think everything too much. On a side note you thought I looked too much into things before I was preggers, you should see me now. I’m 15 times worse!

This may be half the problem I’ve faced my entire life. My mom didn’t warn me of days like this, ever! I never remember my mom saying she had a “bad day” or “just needed a hot bath and a diet coke” like I do way too often. Why do I let a bad second, minute, or maybe even hour ruin my entire day or sometimes even week? My mom NEVER did so how did the world make me into this person I wasn’t raised to be.

In my moms defense: I’m not saying this is a bad thing and she didn’t prepare me for life but really most of the problems my mom (and my dad) had I never knew about. I never heard we couldn’t afford something (even if they couldn’t), or we couldn’t do something (within reason). Yes I was sheltered and I really thought it was the right way to be raised, until I was reading my journal and less than 1 month before my parents split up I wrote that I wanted David’s and I’s relationship to be JUST like my parents. Holy cow. I had no idea any of their issues. My mama didn’t warn me of bad days, and I love and curse her all at the same time for doing that.

Ebay.

As you can tell by the subject I have a confession... it’s a current addiction… and it involves spending entirely too much money on ebay! Honestly, it’s my husbands fault. No really. I was complaining one day about how none of my clothes fit and after a day of shopping I wasn’t desperate enough to spend the $40 they wanted for a pair of maternity jeans. (I don’t even spend that much on pants I could wear for years let alone ones I’ll only wear for the next 4 months)

So David said “why don’t you look on craigslist?”

I replied, “already tried that, not enough options.”

Then he said those brilliant words “what about ebay?”

It’s really no wonder I married this man, he’s a genius! Why didn’t I think of that?

I’ve got a few really good deals so far, we’re talking pants for $2/$3 ($5 for shipping, but still not bad) granted I haven’t received any of the items yet so hopefully they are in as good as condition as their description said.

But then it happened… okay it happened twice… so far… and I can’t guarantee it won’t happen again. Occasionally I forget just how competitive I am and when it comes down to the last few minutes I sit at my computer going back and forth on bids paying little to no attention to how high the price is going because at this point I’m winning no matter the cost. She bids $5.25, I bid $6.00, She bids $6.25, I bid $8.00, she bids $8.25, I bid $10.00… and before you know it I’m up in the thirty dollar price range (before shipping, ugh!) but I’ll be damned if I’m going to loose.

Welcome to my life, it’s a great place, a place where I win period. Feel sorry for my poor husband… so sorry you bring him pumpkin cupcakes, please?

Proof the below post happened…

I couldn’t get a good picture of the outside of our house… the sun is apparently in a bad spot right now….

However, this is our new bed spread I got a killer deal on! Fred Meyer basically paid me to take it out of their store. I love it, mostly because I have a shirt that looks very similar, David isn’t a fan of it yet.

Notice, Jax has his own bed next to David’s side finally he is forced to sleep on the floor.

Currently my favorite table for all the right reasons

Our living room. My favorite part- the TV room is separate and downstairs. Do you want to see the rest of my house? Come visit.

I didn’t eat too much for lunch (ok I did) but my belly is growing as you can see. It’s ok if you think I just look extra fat and round, I do I’ve accepted it. However, I think this is the week people are going to question if I’m “happily married” or if I have a baby bump, by next week it will be clear. Only a week and 2 days until we find out what this little gummy bear is, and not to worry I took the entire day off so I can go shopping after the appointment while hubs goes back to work and it’s payday- what perfect timing?

I don’t have a bestie… and not because I don’t have a favorite (because I do have one of those) I just hate the word! But if I did have one it would be this girl, and did I mention she got married? It’s weird when your ‘favorite’ gets married… now I know how she felt when I got hitched. I’m happy for the new couple, but hope we get together soon for a lunch date (just the 2 of us) and a corn maze/hot cocoa date (w/the hubs) soon… (hint,hint Sar)

update minus the pictures…

Welcome back friends, it’s been awhile since I was on the blogging end of things and much has happened in the few months I’ve been gone… some things very exciting others not so much. So let’s review what’s changed and what hasn’t.

David and I bought a house. We are thrilled about this and finally are all moved in and it’s beginning to feel like home. I loved this house since the day we walked in to look at it because it felt like “home.” Weird I know but lots of houses we walked into just didn’t feel dare I say like us? or right? We found this house on the west side and the price was right… the rest is history. One day I’ll take a picture or 2 to prove this event really happened

We are both still working at the same jobs and happy at that.

Okay let’s get down to the important stuff:

We are having a baby! Scary and true. David is excited and has been since day one, I’ve been scared since the morning we found out, but starting to get excited now. I’ve always felt this is the one thing in life I really can’t plan for, and I’m not good at taking chances and not planning every detail, especially one as huge as this! Looking back I’m so grateful we were able to get pregnant as quick and easy as we did, but I had convinced myself it wasn’t something that was going to come easy for us so you can imagine my shock the morning I peed on that stick. All the pregnancy signs were there but since I’ve never had a child or been around pregnant people much I just thought my headaches, getting up to pee a few times during the night (I never had to do this before, ever!), and weird sickly feelings were all due to my hormones trying to figure themselves out. It wasn’t until I went to wrap my towel around me one morning getting out of the shower that I literally couldn’t because my boobs were so tender (tmi… I know) that I stopped to think when my cycle was due. Then there were the mornings that I literally couldn’t drag myself out of bed I had zero energy and no food sounded appealing. I even remember the time, date, and place (I’ll spare you those details) David joking said “you’re probably pregnant” in which I replied “I hope so because I feel great!” I always thought I would be that horrific pregnant lady who laid in bed for 9 months because I was too miserable to do anything else, I thank my mom for babying me all those sickly years and never making me do anything I didn’t feel like.

Long story short I am just over 18 weeks along and doing well. Very well actually. I went through the tired, lazy, no energy, head ache stages and currently having some back pain and trouble getting comfortable while sleeping. But not once have I thrown up! Not once have I yelled and screamed at David asking him why he did this to me (not yet at least). I definitely don’t feel like myself or “normal” (whatever that is) but overall I feel good and so thankful that I do. Only 2 more weeks until we find out what this little stinker is and the anticipation is killing me. Did I mention we have an adorable pink room, that I’m in love with in our new house? Just our luck it will be a boy! Time will tell…

Now we have internet I will blog more and I will post pictures soon, my 18 week photo wasn’t that great but I swear my belly is growing more everyday and that 17 week photo doesn’t do us justice. I haven’t been telling my customers yet, but I got asked today by a regular if that was a baby bump I had… just 10 short minutes before that she asked if I had lost weight because my face seemed skinnier. At my 16 week appointment I’d lost 1 pound since my first weigh in. Last week my mom told me I better start telling people or they are going to assume I am just getting fat… ha so I guess it’s that time.